Coder jokes and diss challenge

Ever have an almost…static itch, for making horrible nerdy coding jokes? Well this topic is made just to satisfy your said itches publicly! Feel free to go full nerd, but watch your syntax, or your jokes wont make sense! Mind what you say to the public, and make your dad proud with your punchlines! Be as cheeky, rude, and silly as you need to be, BUT NO FLAMING. Keep that shit private. The main purpose of this topic is to have fun! And yes I used a string of coding terms above for puns. So here we go! (Beware, cheesy jokes are inbound)

Anyways, you. YEAH YOU. I heard you tried using “long” variables as the measurement for your dick for that insult to your dept. buddy, but the compiler said it could only accept a “short”

System.exit(0);

String colorpinpoint = “lame”;
String a = “ur”;
String b = “mom”;

if (!colorpinpoint.equals(“cool”)) {
System.out.printf("%s %s", a, b);
}

System.exit();

Expected some “cs_righthand up; cs_righthand down” jokes, but oh well.